I love my Facebook Mommy Groups, but there are an unending list of common sense things that are asked about in them. In the spirit of Pinterest, the repetitiveness inspired me to make this quick list to consolidate months of reading for you into one nice neat package.
Here, to start off 2021 with a bang is a list of 21 things that some of you may be wondering and some of you may be tired of answering… Hopefully all of them will be lessons that will make your life easier.
- Number one thing to remember. No one knew everything the first day. There is no mommy school so don’t be afraid to admit you don’t know what you’re doing.
- Your birth experience is right no matter what decisions you make about it. No one gets awards for doing it without medication or with medication. No one gets recognized for having a regular birth or having a c-section.
- Babies don’t sleep through the night. I don’t know how many times people seem to be surprised by this. It seems like common sense since so many comedies joke about sleep deprived parents during their shows. My kids slept only 45 minutes at a time for the first two years. Webster’s dictionary almost put my picture up next to Sleep deprivation in its book.
- Don’t stock up on too many newborn diapers. They grow fast and you won’t be wearing them for long.
- In the spirit of the above statement…when your kid is changing sizes to a size bigger make sure you measure them even if you think you know what size they are. As a first time mom I had my daughter in shoes 3 sizes too small because I didn’t realize that she’d had a growth spurt and she was too tiny to tell me that her feet hurt when I shoved them in her shoes!
- Breastfeeding is hard. Like with my earlier statement, there is no award you get for doing it or not doing it. If it stresses you and the baby out don’t be afraid to go formula. In this day and age, yes medical professionals say that breastmilk is the one they’d prefer you to try at first, but with companies making supplemental formula for babies, no child is going to be harmed by formula (unless they are allergic to it, but there are always options for these cases.) Both my kids were formula babies and haven’t shown any signs of it affecting their mental or physical health.
- When babies are tiny, never leave home without an extra change of clothes for them and you. Sounds crazy but eventually you will use them. I distinctly remember running late to a family event and having to run into a RiteAid to buy a shirt because my little one had thrown up all over themselves and all over me.
- The word no is going to be part of your vocabulary from now until the kids move out. Remember though that you can also use the word no when you’re feeling overwhelmed and need some Me time. You don’t have to go to every party or even and your kids don’t have to be involved in three million different activities at once!
- Children’s milestones happen in their own times. Don’t compare your kids to others or one another because they won’t happen at the same time. Trust your gut and ask a trained professional for advice if you think something might really be wrong or if there might be a family history that would cause you to pay more attention to certain things.
- Make sure his penis is pointed down when you put his diapers on! This is more of a hack than common sense, but if pointed the wrong direction they will pee up and out of the top of it by his belly button.
- When kids are tired they will act like a Tasmanian devil. While a lot of tantrums are unavoidable no matter what you do, be conscious of your kids activities in a day and nap schedule. When they are growing up they get more tired that they let on and it always seems to be a light switch effect to tantrum instead of a slow ease into one. Plan accordingly.
- Snacks for your kiddos are a must. Growing human beings are always hungry even when they have just been fed. You get to pick what they eat, but they will determine what times of day they need to eat at least for the first few years.
- Try to buy things that your kids won’t immediately outgrow. Car Seats can be fairly expensive but are important. There are many models now that grow with your child from toddler to big kid.
- Car seat rules and regulations are based on height and weight not the age of your child. I don’t know how many times people gage the readiness of their kids to move to the next stage by their age. My 5 year old weighed twice as much as her school best friend. Age was not a consideration for who sat where and how in that case. Safety crash dummies have proven that even into kindergarten age and sometimes first grade, fitting your child to the seat of the car is important no matter what their age is.
- Children will repeat the worst thing you’ve ever said in front them at the most inappropriate times! Don’t shelter your kiddo completely, but think of it like social media. If you think it and you don’t want it to go “viral”, then don’t say it aloud in front of them.
- Children don’t need every toy under the sun. Remember that there are perfectly healthy kids running around in other countries that don’t have the latest video games, bikes, or iPhones. Yes they are fun to play with, but sometimes fewer toys equals more imaginative kids in the end because they have to use their imaginations to think up games and toys instead of getting them handed to them. PS. I’m not hating on anyone who likes to spoil their kids because we all do, but don’t ever feel guilty for withholding the latest and greatest from your kid.
- In keeping with the above common sense item… babies don’t need every gadget on the planet. One item that comes to mind is a wipe warmer! Nice to have, but it’s not a needed item you can’t live without. Remember at some point you’ll be away from your home and their bedroom and its impossible to carry too many gadgets with you when you travel! You are the one that sets the tone with your kiddo so if they get used to warm wipes you’re going to have to deal with them when they don’t have them!
- Personal hygiene is a learned thing! Sounds crazy to say it aloud, but everyone has had a kid at some point refuse to brush their hair or teeth or take a shower. Currently my son is on a three day revolt against showering. Not sure why because he spends 20 minutes in the shower, but today he refuses to get his skin wet!
- At some point someone is going to not be extremely excited about the names you picked for your kid. Let that shit go! It’s a mathematical anomaly if you can find a group of people who all love your kid’s name. The fact is people hear a name and think of a certain person in their head. Their reaction to the name is due to the relationship they had with a previous person with that name, not your baby or kid. My grandmother told me I shouldn’t name my son Mason because it reminded her of Mason jars. Luckily little kids his age don’t even know what a mason jar is half the time!
- When dealing with naming said child, creativity is great, but make sure your kid doesn’t end up with a name like AsShole. YES! That is a real name. The kid was in my aunt’s class one year. It’s said A-Sho-Lee which sounds awesome but clearly that girl’s mother didn’t realize that at some point someone was going to write her name in all caps. ASSHOLE doesn’t seem as cute now, does it? I also heard from another aunt who worked as a lawyer with the CPS department that a mother had named a child BITCH on her birth certificate and when the form got filed the mom got in terviewed for her competency as a mother.
- Never forget that you are the mom. Kids will manipulate you, even without words, to accommodate them. Never put it past them to have an agenda in mind, whether it’s crying until you pick them up or refusing a food you want them to eat because it’s healthy and they want candy. Stand up for yourself! They should not be running your household from morning until night!
I hope you enjoyed this great bit of common sense I’ve thrown at you.
Be sure to check out my 52 Life Lessons notebook. SkechpadsByPatty is my digital store on Etsy and the notebook is one of my newest creations! It gives you a digital place to list out one thing you learn each week this year. It’s great for a personal memory book or to pass along to your little ones later in life. I was inspired to make this book when my mother delivered a family history book handwritten by her mother a few weeks ago. The memories shared were priceless!
The things I’ve listed above would be great when considering something to add to your list of things you learned this week.
Comment below if you want more information and I’ll pass it along Also if you’re an avid reader or can research well you’ll find a code on one of my previous daily thought posts in the last week with a code to get the book free!